Laughter

This weekend, my daughter began to really laugh. Like kid laugh! I swear I even saw her eyes weld up with tears she was laughing so hard.  She started to figure out how to tease (give me her pacifier, smile and take it back before I can get it!) That seems to be so very funny to her. She also has started laughing at other things, but I have yet to figure out why she is laughing and what is so funny! Its really fascinating to watch her find humor in things and to learn what she finds funny.

Humor is everywhere. The best comedy is written about life. Look at satire… novels, movies, TV shows, Saturday Night Live. All examples of people taking topical issues &/or follies and finding the humor in them. One thing I learned in my time with Second City, is that humor is life. Try to be funny and it doesn’t work, but if you look at every day life, humor is everywhere. Especially when you’re around children. As Dr. Seuss said,

“I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living, it’s a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope and that enables you to laugh at life’s realities”.

Sounds like my daughter! There is much laughter from silliness, from seeing daddy walk through the door and from our realities! America’s Funniest Home Videos has made a killing televising home movies that make us laugh at other’s realities &/or oopsies. I hate to admit in writing but there are times I have to laugh when my daughter has an oopsie… Like when she gets so excited about something and then loses her balance and just topples over. Obviously I worry about her safety and embrace her with warmth and comfort to ease her pain, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t funny. It is.  I mean the look on her face when she goes from excited to uh oh…I’m about to topple over! It’s pretty funny. I like to say these interactions are a way of teaching us to laugh at ourselves.  I tumble. I have oopsies and when the brief pain subsides, the laughter begins. Because truth be told, I probably looked kinda funny as I missed the stool trying to gracefully sit on it or the look on my face as I knocked my knee on the same corner of the coffee table over and over again knowing the table has been there forever! It’s pretty funny…. So where is the lesson here… maybe the deeper lesson is to learn to differentiate a real oopsie from a funny one. Or that humor is subjective. How do we know when its serious or when it’s a silly folly. When do we know our laughing is hurting someone’s feelings and what do we do with that? What do we do when one person is laughing and the other is crying?

With the emphasis and tragedies that surround the topic of Bullying, I worry. I worry as a mom, I worry as an educator, and I worry as a citizen. What has happened that this has become an epidemic? Where does it start? At home, school, TV? I can have the most loving environment for my child and teach her to be secure and to laugh at herself and not take things so seriously, but that won’t stop someone from tormenting her. That won’t stop someone from hurting her feelings. Truth is, even the strong have feelings and even the strong get hurt. So what can we do? We can talk. We can laugh. We can love. We can try to understand.  But how do I know that will work? What happens when someone laughs at her and not with her?  How do I teach my child to fend for herself, but still keep true to our beliefs as a family?

Fortunately, for me, I have a while before my child has those social interactions that would elicit bullying behavior. But I can’t help but feel that those lessons start now, when they are young. My 10 months old watches and takes notes. What does she notice? What is funny to her and why? When do I draw the line? Do I ever let my child laugh at my follies? Do I also put her in her place when it’s gotten too far? When she’s older do we talk about the world we see? Do we talk about the ugly truth along with the beautiful? How do I react when I have an oopsie? These simple small interactions at home are the building blocks to those interactions on the playground, school bus, and school locker room.

Laughter, a simple emotion, can have so many consequences-good and bad. There may be no real answer. I can try to find the answer and it may work for me maybe you, but not everyone. Then what? We can’t live in a bubble. But we can talk and be honest with each other and ourselves. Maybe we can have fun while doing it. Maybe I can continue to find humor in life and try to teach my daughter to do the same.

Right now my daughter laughs at the silly things in life. It’s innocent, mysterious, playful and oh so very cute! I start to giggle and laugh at her contagious laughter. It reminds me of the last time I truly laughed- about 4 months ago…thanks to my brother. Boy did we laugh. I laughed so hard my stomach hurt and my eyes started watering…I laughed so hard that when I finally stopped laughing I couldn’t remember what was so funny.  What a great feeling!

Milton Berle once said, “Laughter is an instant vacation”. Its been awhile…I could use another one….AND its cheap!

I hope today you find freedom in sharing your thoughts and find laughter in your heart.

In Love, Laughter and Life